• Enter LEAR, KENT disguised, and FOOL

    LEAR

    (to KENT, giving him letters) Go you before to Gloucester with these letters. Acquaint my daughter no further with anything you know than comes from her demand out of the letter. If your diligence be not speedy, I shall be there afore you.

    KENT

    I will not sleep, my lord, till I have delivered your letter.
    Exit KENT

    FOOL

    If a man’s brains were in ’s heels, were ’t not in danger of kibes?

    LEAR

    Ay, boy.

    FOOL

    10Then, I prithee, be merry. Thy wit shall ne'er go slipshod.

    LEAR

    Ha, ha, ha!

    FOOL

    Shalt see thy other daughter will use thee kindly. For though she’s as like this as a crab’s like an apple, yet I can tell what I can tell.

    LEAR

    15Why, what canst thou tell, my boy?

    FOOL

    She will taste as like this as a crab does to a crab. Thou canst tell why one’s nose stands i' th' middle on ’s face?
  • LEAR enters with KENT in disguise, and the FOOL.

    LEAR

    (to KENT, giving him letters) Go ahead of us and deliver these letters to the Earl of Gloucester. Answer my daughter’s questions about the letter, but don’t tell her anything else you know. If you’re not quick enough, I’ll get there before you.

    KENT

    I won’t sleep until I’ve delivered your letter, my lord.
    KENT exits.

    FOOL

    If a man’s brain were in his feet, wouldn’t it be susceptible to frostbite?

    LEAR

    Yes, boy.

    FOOL

    In that case, cheer up. Your brains won’t need slippers to protect them from frostbite, since your brains aren’t in your feet—if they were you wouldn’t take this useless journey to see Regan.

    LEAR

    Ha, ha, ha!

    FOOL

    Your other daughter Regan will treat you kindly, you’ll see. Even though she’s as similar to Goneril as one crabapple is like another, still… I know what I know.

    LEAR

    And what do you know, boy?

    FOOL

    I know that Regan will taste just like Goneril—both of them sour crabapples. Do you know why the nose is in the middle of a person’s face?