• Alarum. Drums and trumpets. Enter AGRIPPA and others

    AGRIPPA

    Retire! We have engaged ourselves too far.
    Caesar himself has work, and our oppression
    Exceeds what we expected.
    Exeunt
    Alarums. Enter ANTONY, and SCARUS, wounded

    SCARUS

    O my brave Emperor, this is fought indeed!
    5Had we done so at first, we had droven them home
    With clouts about their heads.

    ANTONY

                                                                 Thou bleed’st apace.

    SCARUS

    I had a wound here that was like a “T,”
    But now ’tis made an “H.”
    Sound retreat far off

    ANTONY

                                                           They do retire.

    SCARUS

    We’ll beat ’em into bench-holes. I have yet
    10Room for six scotches more.
    Enter EROS

    EROS

    They are beaten, sir, and our advantage serves
    For a fair victory.

    SCARUS

                                       Let us score their backs
    And snatch ’em up, as we take hares, behind!
    ’Tis sport to maul a runner.

    ANTONY

                                                           I will reward thee
    15Once for thy sprightly comfort and tenfold
    For thy good valor. Come thee on.
  • A call to battle is sounded. Drums and trumpets sound. AGRIPPA and other soldiers of Caesar’s enter.

    AGRIPPA

    Retreat! We’ve advanced too far. Caesar himself is in trouble and there are more adversaries than we expected.
    They exit.
    A battle call. ANTONY enters with SCARUS, who is wounded.

    SCARUS

    Oh, my brave Emperor, this is what I call a fight! If we’d fought like this before, we’d have driven them home with bandaged heads.

    ANTONY

    You’re bleeding a lot.

    SCARUS

    I had a scar here that looked like a “T”; now it’s an “H.”
    Distant trumpets sound the retreat.

    ANTONY

    They’re retreating.

    SCARUS

    We’ll chase ’em into their latrines. I still have room for six more wounds.
    EROS enters.

    EROS

    They’re retreating, sir, and our superiority indicates a clear victory.

    SCARUS

    Let’s slash their backs and grab ’em like we do rabbits, from behind. It’s fair game to mark a coward.

    ANTONY

    I’ll reward you once for your cheerfulness and ten times for your courage. Come on.